22 Minutes

You give me 22 minutes, I'll give you the world. Just kidding--it will by no means take 22 minutes to read this, and I have very little to say. Also, AM radio is a fail.

Have you ever gotten a finger jammed in a door? I'll bet you have. Have you ever managed, on the other hand, to jam a finger in a doorKNOB? That is a feat difficult to repeat, yet it is one I have accomplished-eat. (And, in case you were wondering, it was a finger belonging to me.)

Sometimes I am creeped out by other Americans. If you've ever read an article on Yahoo! News, you probably share my sentiment. It's not the content of the actual news pieces that is scary--though I guess I wouldn't say they epitomize journalistic genius--but it is the comments at the bottom of the articles that are really frightening. For example, I just read this article, which was tame enough; but I made the mistake of scrolling a little too far down the page. For your own enjoyment and/or disquiet, here is a sampling of what I witnessed:

"I HOPE ALL GAY PEOPLE MOVE TO SAN FRANCISCO. IT WON'T BE LONG BEFORE THERE IS A GREAT UPHEAVEL. 3-4 YEARS.
IT'S POSSIBLE THAT THE UPPER SECTION OF CALIFORNIA COULD BE LIFTED OFF THE CONTINENT AND SENT SAILING OFF INTO THE PACIFIC OCEAN. BYE YU'ALL."

"1) Gays are an abnomation because they cann't produce offspring.
a) Plenty of stright coules cann't reprodruce, I guess that means their an abonamtion.
2) Gays are an abnomation because they perform elistit sax acts. Poop shooter.
b) Better get a gov type to watch stright couples they do the same things"

 "Our Receptionist once told us her 1st grade son told her that the biggest word in the English language was " If". And so it is. What if the Little Flower's story that God the Father placed her in Hell for 2 minutes. And from her vantage point she said " Souls fall too Hell like leaves from the trees in Autumn." A voice overhead stated " More souls go too Hell for sins against sex than for any other reason. What if those sins are Homosexuality & Abortion ? What if? I actually believe that Abortion Clinics are America's Death Camps ( murdering 50 million babies, born & unborn to date ) & I panic over my gay brothers fate who has Aids. What if ?"

And Francis, who has a problem with voiceless dental fricatives, says it all: "i can see dat americans are getting stupid."